I’m gonna go ahead and admit that this post is going to be a bit more stream-of-consciousness and ranty than usual. I typically like to plan my posts out, even if they’re spur of the moment, and have some sort of outline, but I’m doing something a bit different here.

How often do you find yourself looking at your phone way too late at night just constantly refreshing the page you were on? The algorithm is exhausted, you’re out of new posts to browse, and you keep swiping down anyway; you should have been asleep two hours ago but maybe, just maybe, if you refresh just one more time you’ll find something new.

You don’t.

This is something I’ve gotten really bad about during the recent COVID-19 pandemic. More and more often I realize I’m sitting at my desk with Facebook open on my computer and Instagram open on my phone, scrolling and refreshing, scrolling and refreshing. I literally just caught myself doing it while writing this post, and I know for a fact that this habit leads to a negative feedback loop; I see what other people my age are doing, feel bad that I’m not doing more with my life, listen to some sad music, feel determined to do better… and refresh Facebook.

A few years ago, I found myself in a similar situation. During breaks at work I’d go sit in my car, eat, and endlessly scroll Facebook. I wasn’t happy with my job, and the constant social media comparisons just compounded the issue. Eventually, I did the only thing I could think to do to get out of the habit.

I deleted Facebook. Well, off of my phone, at least. I left my account active and just checked it at night when I got home, and you know what?

I replaced the Facebook browsing with Reddit. I didn’t completely get rid of the problem. The bright side, though, was that on Reddit I at least got exposure to a wide variety of content. I got to see news, creative content, and relapsed into an addiction to creepypasta and r/NoSleep. Even though I had replaced one vice with another, I realized before long that I was so much happier than I was when I was constantly scrolling Facebook.

I’m not exactly sure when I started using Facebook and other apps so heavily again, but I feel like it’s about time to start weaning myself off of social media again. Don’t get me wrong, I love feeling connected; Facebook is pretty much the only way I’ve kept up with extended family for several years now. It’s also an incredible media and marketing tool. As an artist, I find it important to have an outlet to share my work and connect with people, and social media makes it so much easier than it would be otherwise.

I’ve already more or less dropped Snapchat. That happened a while ago, actually. I’ve been logging in somewhat regularly here recently when I’m extra bored, just to check out stories from friends. Then I remember that I’m not really missing much there and delete the app again. It’s a cycle.

I think what I’m trying to say here is this: social media is a wonderful tool. The ability to stay connected with friends and family no matter where they are is incredible (LINE is the only way I’ve stayed connected to my friends in Japan), but it’s easy to take it too far. Endlessly comparing yourself to your peers is unhealthy. I can pretty confidently say that if you’re not exactly where you want to be in life, social media isn’t necessarily going to make you feel better about it.

I think I’m going to delete my Facebook app again soon. It’s not like I can go much of anywhere right now anyway, and it’ll be better for me not to spend an hour scrolling through it before I even manage to drag myself out of bed in the morning.

Here’s to taking the first steps to leading a healthier, happier lifestyle.

So, I’m going to be totally honest: the last year or two, I haven’t really listened to a lot of music, and I’ve barely played or written any myself. Hell, even the song I recently released with Ian Dawkins was written and recorded two years ago. I finished it last July! It’s felt for a long time now like my passion and drive have been missing. I started listening to podcasts when I drive, primarily horror audio dramas, and hadn’t been discovering new music since I moved back to NC. Lately, though, I’ve been trying to give it another shot. I’m listening to old playlists some when I drive, making sure I have an epic soundtrack ready for D&D, and have been picking the guitar up here and there to learn a song or two. As I’m listening to music new and old, I thought that I would share here what I’ve been finding! So, without further ado, here are five songs from the last several years that have reshaped my taste in music.

5. You and I Can - Gardiner Sisters

I wanted to go ahead and get this one out of the way; a lot of people know that a few years ago, I went through a phase where I was utterly OBSESSED with the Gardiner Sisters. A friend of mine showed me their cover of “Home/Dirty Paws” our sophomore year of college, and it just spiraled from there. I bought merch, went to shows, and my siblings and I even sent them a Christmas present one year. This song in particular really got me when it came out. At the time, I lived 400 miles away from my family, and this song reminded me so much of my brother and sisters and helped me to feel close to them when I lived seven hours away (and it probably didn’t help that it came out just as I was going into a relapse of my GS obsession). I knew that regardless of which one, a Gardiner Sisters song was going on the list and it was a bit hard to pick at first, but the personal connection I have to this one just puts it over the top

4. In Bloom - Neck Deep

This one is a newer favorite of mine. I had never really listened to Neck Deep until earlier this year, despite having always been a fan of pop punk. My high school days were full of Green Day, Fall Out Boy, Panic! at the Disco and God knows how many other similar bands. My girlfriend introduced me to Neck Deep a year or so ago and around the start of the pandemic I decided to really give them a chance. This song, though it’s pretty different from a lot of their other music, got my attention without even trying. The poppy feel, catchy chorus, and honest lyrics (especially the matter-of-fact way Ben sings “I was such a little shit.” in the second verse) were pretty much guaranteed to suck me in and make a me a fan.

3. Numbers - Daughter

Another obsession that I went through a few years ago was with the game Life is Strange (which we’re not going to get into because that’s a whole blog post in itself). Long story short, I picked the game up during a Steam sale because the soundtrack hooked me and that was pretty much all it took. I was ecstatic when the prequel, Life is Strange: Before the Storm, was announced, and I felt no different about the music in the trailer than I did for the original. I had never heard of Daughter, but as soon as I figured out who was doing the soundtrack I bought both of the albums they had out and the game soundtrack. I love absolutely everything about this song: the reverse, reverb-drowned snare, the big drums and bass that pound the song forward, the somber tone. The chorus is simple but incredibly effective, and I instantly connected on a personal level. There was no way I could make this list without this one.

2. No EQ - Into It. Over It.

The summer of 2016 was my first summer away from home; I’d been in college for three years, and this was my first year in an apartment. That summer will always have a special place in my heart, and I often find myself wishing I could go back. I had new, incredible friends, had just turned twenty-one, and was getting my first real experience with freedom and adulthood. Near the end of that school year, the university radio station started playing this song that was completely different from everything else they played, and I had to have more. A quick search on my smartphone let me know exactly what I needed to know, and I bought the album without listening to a single other song. I got lucky and loved every minute of it; I listened to it on repeat for pretty much the entire summer. Into It. Over It. introduced me to a completely new genre of music, and this song kickstarted it all.

1. Sunflower - Post Malone and Swae Lee

As I sat here writing this post, I was going through my Spotify to find just one more song to add in; I had tons of songs in mind, but a lot of them were similar to songs I’ve already included and I felt like that wasn’t really a good representation of the variety of music I like to listen to. I saw this song at the top of my “Liked” playlist and I honestly can’t believe I was going to forget it. I watched Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse for the first time on the plane to Japan last year (and watched it for the second time on the plane back to the States) and it’s without a doubt one of my favorite movies of all time. Spider-Man is my favorite superhero, which is ironic because I’m terrified of spiders. The movie was just so well made, from the art style to the writing, the voice acting, and the soundtrack. I danced along a little in my seat the first time, the second time I knew a few words, and on every viewing since I sing along to pretty much the whole thing (about as well as Miles does). I don’t listen to a ton of Post Malone, but this song made his work a bit more available to me, and I just don’t get tired of it.

Well, there ya have it! Remember, these songs aren’t necessarily my “Top 5 Songs Of All Time” or anything like that. Each one of these songs served a purpose in opening me up to new experiences, to connecting to someone in a new way, or just showed me a genre of music that I hadn’t discovered at that time in my life!

It was difficult to narrow it down to just five, so a few honorable mentions include “Poison Oak” by Bright Eyes, “To All of You” by Syd Matters, “Through The Cellar Door” by Lanterns on the Lake, “Hold my Hand” by Jess Glynne, and so, so many more than I can reasonably list in a single post.

I’m starting to find a connection with music again, and I hope I can get it to stick this time.

What are some of your favorite songs, songs that changed your life, or something you’ve just been listening to lately?

The world is experiencing a crisis.

International leaders are suggesting that people self-isolate; businesses are closing, schools are cancelling, and every store everywhere is out of TOILET PAPER. For many, isolation means financial insecurity. For some, it means some unexpected vacation time. For more of us, isolation is a problem for a completely different reason.

I have a tendency to self-isolate by accident when I’m experiencing a period of heavy stress, anxiety, or a mild depressive spell. I work through the motions of a “daily routine” before locking myself in my room with my phone on silent and sad music playing that I may or may not actually be paying attention to. I have to put in an extra amount of conscious effort to talk to people or go outside. Some of these days, I struggle to even do so much as watch Netflix or play a video game. It compounds further and further until I reach a point where my mental state has spiraled so far that my own existence comes into question.*

What do you do when no volume of music, no level of escapism can cover up the sounds of panic from inside your own head? What do you do when reality starts to split apart at the seams and the walls of your own home, the space that’s supposed to be safer than any other, start to close in around you and force you to shut yourself off to a point that the laws of physics become nonsensical and the current timeline no longer feels like the real world?

Ahem.

What I’m trying to say is this: the COVID-19 situation is going to be difficult for everyone for a period of time that we really can’t determine yet. There are many of us who are going to struggle with pre-existing mental conditions that definitely do not benefit from being alone. Remember to take care of yourself, and reach out to friends and family that you know are going to have a hard time with this. Send a text that just says “hey, hope you’re doing alright”, or offer to go with someone to make a supply run (avoiding physical contact and washing your hands immediately afterwards, of course).

As for me, I’m going to play multiplayer video games, spend time with my brother and girlfriend, and get some schoolwork done with some free time I seem to have come across.

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I’m also going to enjoy a bottle of Scotch that I really shouldn’t have bought. YOLO.

*I am by no means suicidal. I spent a lot of time last year working with a therapist, and my current mental condition can be summarized as “anxious but stable”.

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A baby emo, circa 2008

When I was fourteen, I decided I wanted to grow out my hair. It was my simple, inoffensive way to rebel. I wanted to be edgy, I wanted to stand out, and I wanted to have some sort of agency over myself. I remember my first attempt at a “cool and edgy” profile picture on MySpace: I was home alone, didn’t know what a hair straightener looked like, much less how to use one, and just combed my hair straight down in my face and took a picture on my mom’s laptop webcam. Looking back it’s pretty cringey, but at the time I was just excited to be different.

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From baby emo to adolescent emo. It was only supposed to be highlights.

After that, I went through different phases. I accidentally dyed it blonde, I straightened it daily, I started tying it back. Eventually I even dyed it blue! It didn’t matter how old I was, but my self-expression always seemed to revolve around my hair, and I ended up building my entire identity around it. My hair was the one thing that was truly, completely mine that I could do anything I wanted with. Everybody knew me for my hair; it was long, it was (mostly) well-kept, and it made me me.

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The “Founding Father” isn’t a good look for anyone

All through high school I kept it long. People would ask if I was ever going to cut it, and I always responded “I don’t know. Maybe one day.” It grew out of the awkward, baby emo phase and fell well past my shoulders. I considered myself a metalhead, and the hair was an important part of my image. After all, what good is headbanging without long hair, right?

Eventually, at the end of my freshman year of college, I decided I wanted to cut it. I was going through a rough patch, and decided that I wanted to reinvent myself. New hair, new me, right? Except it was kind of an awkward haircut and I didn’t really like it that much. See, if I used product and put time into it and got it to slick back just right it looked fine! Otherwise it just kinda fell around my face to the bottom of my eyes and I looked like someone stole me from Saved by the Bell.

So I grew it back out. I knew I’d be comfortable with it, and honestly? I missed it. I went through all of the stages again: short, a little longer, kinda awkward, really awkward, finally being able to tie it back and pretend it’s not awkward, and finally I had long hair once more.

For the next five years I let it stay long. I trimmed it twice a year or so and primarily wore it in a clip for work and school. I tried to ignore it when my hairline started receding; I was completely oblivious when it started thinning on top. It had gone from a part of my image to a security blanket that I wasn’t willing to give up.

I’ll admit it: I don’t like change. Change is hard, and scary, and uncomfortable. Right now, I’m going through a period in life where change is necessary and important. In a little more than three months, I’ll be finished with my Master’s degree. I’m looking for new jobs and new apartments in new cities, and that means that I have to stop ignoring real life and be willing to accept change. One of the easiest ways I could think to do this (while simultaneously accepting my receding hairline and enhancing my potential job prospects) was to cut my hair.

So I did.

It was an incredibly hard decision. I cried for half an hour the night before and considered canceling my appointment. It’s been hard to get used to. Two weeks later I’m still trying to make sure it doesn’t get caught in the car door and under my body when I sleep, and I still get kind of sad thinking about it. Cutting my hair felt like part of me was leaving; a part of me that I had grown very attached to was going away, and I couldn’t undo it.

At the same time, it’s felt somewhat liberating. I feel like a new person, in some ways; I feel like I’m ready to move on to the next phase of my life and grow into a “real” adult (despite none of that being true).

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It’s okay to form an identity around a part of you that you like. It’s okay to use something as a security blanket, to keep you comfortable when life gets difficult. It’s important, though, to realize that change is a part of life. Things are always going to change and move forward whether you’re ready for it or not. Sometimes things that you’re very happy with are going to change, and it’s normal to want to find something to cling on to. I’m struggling with this a LOT right now. I’ll be 25 in just a few months, and the concept of the big 3-0 approaching in the next couple of years regularly drives me to existential panic (but that’s a blog post for another time).

I guess what I’m trying to say is that life can be scary. Terrifying, even. The world moves forward more quickly than most of us would like, and none of us are ever REALLY prepared for what gets thrown at us. Some people deal with it better than others (I’m definitely one of the “others”), and some people end up clinging on to the past and find themselves unable to grow. We all have to learn to let go and accept progress. Just because things are changing doesn’t mean it’s bad; sometimes, change can be good.

So, uh… first off I’d just like to say that I had no idea it had been over a year since I’d last posted here. Whoops. I’m finishing up my graduate degree right now, and for the last year and a half it’s been incredibly difficult to keep up with literally anything. I feel driven, though, and am determined to to return to producing content this year. Be on the lookout for music, photos, videos, collaborations, and possibly even live streams! Hopefully I can keep the promises I’ve made to myself while I work on transitioning into a professional role in the “real world”.

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s move on to the real intention behind this post: some of my favorite moments from shoots in 2019.

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Follow @alittletouchofwhimsy on Instagram!

First up is this shot from early 2019 of Danielle Mull as Princess Bubblegum from Adventure Time. This was my first cosplay shoot and I really couldn’t be happier with how these turned out. The lighting, the location, and the model’s work on the costume all came together for some seriously regal finished photos! Danielle and I have worked together several times now (as we’ve been dating for a little over a year and cosplay boyfriends are really just personal photographers), and I think this is still one of my top pictures from any shoot we’ve done together!

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In May of 2019, I was lucky enough to get to take a trip to Japan with my program through the graduate school at Appalachian State. Over the course of ten days, we visited Tokyo, Osaka, Okayama, Hiroshima, and Kyoto. We saw various shrines (my favorite of which was Fushimi Inari), ate plenty of local food, bought yukata, and sang karaoke. We met with business owners, exchanged gifts, met locals, and I can not wait to go back one day. This photo was taken in the Korakuen gardens at Okayama Castle. The site was absolutely breathtaking, and photos cannot do architecture of this magnitude justice.

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My friend Ashlyn was kind enough to join me for a shoot in late August around the town of Boone, NC. I hadn’t shot seriously in months, and was starting to feel a desperate need for some sort of creative outlet. I reached out to her because I knew she had some experience with modeling, and she absolutely knocked it out of the park. I was standing around trying to figure out what to do when this fence, and she decided that the best option was to just… climb it. I snapped some pictures from the other side, then moved around for this one and almost blinded myself because the sun was not where I expected it to be. This was the only picture from that angle I bothered to take, and regardless of the potential damage to my retinas, it’s one of my favorites from 2019.

From here, I’m simply going to add a few more images in to show my other favorites from the year. The photos above were some of the most memorable, but that doesn’t mean I don’t like my other work from 2019. It’s true, I didn’t shoot as regularly as I would’ve wanted, and I’m planning to remedy that in 2020. For now, enjoy these shots and be on the lookout for updates!

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Hi.

It’s been a hell of a year. I’ve lived in three different places, worked three different jobs, entered a new relationship, and started grad school. I’ve barely used any time this year to take pictures or make music, and I’ve hardly even touched an instrument in months. Hell, other than adding two or three photos, I haven’t even updated this site since May. All of the artistic plans I had completely fell through, and I’ve been left trying to find any sort of motivation for most of the year.

Well, I’m finally making an attempt at being creative again. Schoolwork takes a lot out of me, but I’ve been playing more since the semester ended, and I really hope to continue making time for it when the next semester begins. ‘

I do have some things coming up soon, though! I’m in the middle stages of a new cover/collaboration, and may actually be able to drop some new original music soon, as well!

I’m going to really try to start updating things at least SOMEWHAT regularly again, but I can’t make any promises right now, simply due to my state of mind.

Hope to see you guys again soon, thanks for being patient.

Seth

Okay so... hi? I guess. It's been a while, and I gots so 'splainin' to do. 

So, around September I started a job that was, honestly, awful. During the last few months of the year, we were so absurdly busy that I didn't have a lot of time or energy to do anything. This led to me just NOT doing anything. At all. For months. 

Then, it slowed down and I DID have time... and I registered for the GRE. There was a span of about six months where I didn't do much music for myself, I didn't take pictures, I didn't do ANYTHING. I shut myself off.

Now, here we are in May. I took the GRE last weekend and I think I did well enough to get into my intended program. I'm currently living with my parents and not stressing too much over money. I'm working a job that is MUCH better than my last one, and I'm excited to be moving back to Boone in August. 

All of this being said, I'm hoping to actually start putting out some content again. I dunno what or when... but I'll get there! 

I'm SO bad at remembering to update this thing. I'm trying, I really am!

A bit of an update that I've been meaning to get out for a while now: I'm taking a short break from making music. Don't worry, I'm not giving it up or anything. For a while now, though, I've really been forcing myself to try to sit down and work on stuff, so it hasn't felt very natural and therefore hasn't been very productive. 

Also, I registered today to take the GRE to get into grad school... so I have lots of studying to do. Hopefully, I'll be posting regular content some time in a few months! 

Thanks for being patient, guys. 

Hey, guys! Be on the look out for new music, soon!

Whoa, I forgot I have a website kinda. I'll try to start updating regularly again.

Work has been kicking my ass recently. The job I mentioned back in August sadly didn't work out. There were no hard feelings when I left, as everyone that I worked with was incredible. They all just made me feel so motivated and driven. Unfortunately, the position just wasn't a good fit for me. 

Instead, I picked up a job through a staffing agency and I've been there since, just attempting to make/save some money while I figure things out. I've been feeling a lot better mentally and emotionally the last couple of weeks, though, and I'm starting to really have fun with music and art stuff again. I know it's after New Years, but at the end of this post check out a fun video I just put together for the holidays!

To update those who don't know, I'm planning on going back to school. I realized that my current education and skill set aren't going to get me to the place in life that I want to be at, so I intend to go back to Appalachian State to work on a Master's in Business Administration, and I'll concentrate in either International Business or Business Analytics. I'm actually super excited for it!

Also, I've been working a lot recently with a great songwriter named Ed! Check his stuff out here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC2fW8sFjGSHK9246j52mbNQ

Thanks for reading guys. I'll try to stay more on top of the updates from now on! Enjoy this somewhat silly medley of Christmas carols, and check out the other new stuff on the channel!